Sunday, November 15, 2009

screaming out of my skin

Thu, May 18, 2006
here's a whirling dervish going on inside my head
inside I glimmer like the sun that has finally come to dry out the flowers...
the dancer in these bones is begging for release
to feel the purity of the spring air
to feel the giddiness of naked skin in the velvet of night
but yet these ropes that bind me
I cannot see them, cannot cut them
they are my own mind
my push to get through
get beyond the exhaustion that is taking me
to the point beyond reason
it does no good to cry
or scream
but that is exactly what I long to do
just so I can remember that I still feel
something other than the calmness
that gets me through this challange...

that's what I feel like right now, sitting in this chair... I have been spending 12 to 13 hours a day in this chair, stretching my head to fit all the information in. I feel giddy, excited, pissed, depressed, tired and crazy all at the same time... maybe I ought to drink less tea. Hahaha. No, really; it's just vet school. almost there. two more exams- one on Monday (a big one) and then a not so big one thursday, and then I will officially be 1/2 a doctor!!! I will be a third year, and merely inches away from clinics.
Meanwhile... I'm going to go crazy now, I'll be back later.

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